Meet Steve and Emma

It took months for us to be matched with a child who the FosterCare UK team felt would be the right fit for our family and our set up.

I mention that because that’s far and away a positive thing. The last thing you want when you start fostering is to experience a breakdown between you and your foster child because you’re not compatible. For children and young people who’ve already gone through so much, that would be a completely unnecessary upset.

So my wife Emma and I really appreciated the care taken to find us the perfect match. 

We were approved as foster carers in January 2021, and although we had an emergency placement over a few weeks that Easter, we weren’t matched with K until July 2021. Before we started fostering we imagined any foster child we cared for would be around a similar age to our birth children M, 11, and R, eight.

But during the panel assessment procedure we were signed off as being suitable for any age of child or young person.

K, who’s 16, gets on great with our son and daughter, and he’s settled into the family with ease. From the start it was clear we were compatible as I’d say we’re all pretty calm and level-headed.

During the assessment process, we’d made it clear that we were happy to support any foster child’s interests, and this is certainly true with K. He’s a hugely talented acrobatic gymnast who has competed at club level. Three times a week, we drive him to his training sessions in his hometown. It’s a 40-minute drive each way from where we live.

We’ve also been to competitions that he’s performed in, including one when he represented his school and received a special mention from the judge. There was a family trip up to Liverpool to see the England squad perform, too.

K has just done his GCSEs, and his next step is to go onto college to study dance, and then study circus skills later on. For us it’s important that K is able to carry on with his interests. He’s a very determined and talented young man who we’re proud to support.

Making the decision to foster

Emma and I had been talking about fostering for a while, but when we moved into a home with a spare room we decided it was the right time for us.

We spotted an advert for FosterCare UK on social media, and when we made contact they were thorough in explaining everything - including the ups and downs and challenges of fostering.

The assessment process was fitted around our work commitments as my job is full time and Emma works part time. 

If you work and want to foster, it’s not an automatic no-no - I’d urge you to make an initial inquiry to discuss your own circumstances with them. As it turns out, Emma’s employer has been very supportive and have made accommodations like allow her to change shifts to attend foster training sessions.

Involving our children

Before we set out on our fostering journey, we wanted to check our birth children were completely on board.

They were really positive about the idea. So much so in fact that they offered to swap bedrooms so a foster child could have a bigger room! We’re proud of our children for lots of reasons. But I’ve got to say, for them to display such a lot of empathy and selflessness really makes me beam with pride.

 The team at FosterCare UK were just as inclusive, and wanted to know how the kids felt. The fact that they focused on making sure everyone was comfortable with what was happening was really positive for us.

We hope we’re at the start of a long fostering journey and our family is able to carry on making a real difference to children and young people’s lives in our own way.